Who were the first people ever recorded in writing? /u/MissingPuzzle actually dug deep and found the answer: A Sumerian slave owner and his two slaves. Digging a little further, I found that the tablet is dated to ~3100 BCE.
Reading the tablet starting at the top and going down by column, it reads 2 KUR.SAL GAL SAL EN PAP X SUKKAL GIR3gunû or in English "Two slaves held by Gal Sal: En-pap X and Sukkalgir."
Woods, Christopher. "The Earliest Mesopotamian Writing" in Visible Language: Inventions of Writing in the Ancient Middle East and Beyond. Chicago: Oriental Institute Museum Publications. 2010.
The Oriental Institute 2010-2011 Annual Report. Ed. by Zuhal Kuru. Chicago: University of Chicago. 2011.